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“On this program (I think it was the History Channel or A&E) they were showing footage from the Zapruder film. The Zapruder film is the film shot by Abraham Zapruder of John F. Kennedy’s assassination. For more information on the Zapruder film, here’s a link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zapruder_film While watching the video something caught my eye. It bothered me, and I had to figure out what it was. I found a copy of the film online so that I could study it carefully. There’s one shot where the camera jostles a bit and briefly pans up. It’s very quick (probably why no one has noticed it), but when it pans up you can see a row of windows on a building on the opposite side of the street. Very briefly (exactly eight frames) you can see a figure leaning out one of the windows with what appears to be a rifle. I’ve gone over these eight frames carefully and extensively, using software to zoom in and clarify the image. It is clear to me now that the figure leaning out the window with a rifle is none other than Dakota Fanning. But this isn’t even the worst of it. You see, if Dakota was present at the assassination of JFK, then it stands to reason that she has access to some sort of time machine. This leads to the question: If she has the ability to travel through time, what other horrible things is she (or will she be) responsible for? I’ve been working on a theory that she used some type of magnetic device to pull the meteor to Earth that killed all the dinosaurs. Our future, our very existence is in jeopardy. We must stop her. I have shown you the truth. It is imperative that you warn others. I believe that it is not too late, and that if we act now we can stop her. Sic Semper Tyrannus!”
So whats all this? More insanity on the IMDB boards. Bizarre creativity, or in need of a new cornstarch supplier? You decide…
