Now I present to you my top 5 and worst 5 for 2005. (Dakota is exempt from these awards)
Top 5 Movies (If you did not like these movies, you should be exempt from living)
1. Serenity (”My turn”)
2. The Wedding Crashers (my first time laughing in a theater)
3. Howl’s Moving Castle (16 year old turned into 80 year old, technically still 16 though)
4. Kung Fu Hustle (nice tribute to Return of Condor Heroes)
5. The movie I made at home (for lack of any other movies)
Worst 12 Movies (If you piss me off, I will kidnap you and make you watch these:)
-12. The Master of the Crimson Armor (The Promise)
-11. Star Wars Revenge of the Sith
-10. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
-9. The Brothers Grimm
-8. Fantastic Four
-7. Herbie: Fully Loaded
-6. The Corpse Bride
-5. Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous
-4. The Pacifier
-3. The Wedding Date
-2. Pride and Prejudice
-1. The Chronicles of Narnia
(Yeah, lots of crap movies this year)
Top 5 Albums (Albums I would put in my iPod if I had an iPod)
1. Xenogears: Light - Yasunori Mitsuda (Instrumental Bliss)
2. Super Extra Gravity - The Cardigans (I Need Some Fine Wine, and You, You Need to be Nicer)
3. L.A.M.B. - Gwen Stefani (This album is Bananers)
4. Amerantine - Enya (Makes you sometimes want to cry)
5. I Am Me - Ashlee Simpson (Makes me wanna La La)
Top 5 TV
1. Boston Legal (”cuckoo for cocoa puffs”)
2. House (”people say you can’t live without love, oxygen is more important”)
3. Veronica Mars (”If I die unexpectedly, do me a favour: go on Oprah and tell the world I loved kittens”)
4. Entourage (”Got MILF?”)
5. Everwood (”she has that Dakota Fanning thing going on”)
Worst 5 TV
-5. Lost (looks like the writers got lost)
-4. The OC (you know it got bad when you have a “Chrismaca Barmisfaca”)
-3. Numb3rs (can’t count how many things are wrong with this snorefest)
-2. Close to Home (marnie being boring is uh, boring)
-1. Smallville (somebody save me from this crap)
Top 5 Overated Actors
Heath Leadger (he, eherm, played a gay cowboy)
Patrick Dempsey (some needs to cut YOUR brain if you like him)
Owen Wilson (I would break his nose if it werent already)
Mathew McConahey (voted sexiest man alive [by Tom Cruise])
Tom Cruise (arrested for assault on a couch)
Top 5 Overated Actresses
-5. Patricia Arquette (now that you have money, fix your teeth and shave)
-4. Ziyi Zhang (nevah mind Americanizing your name, you angry Chinese woman)
-3. Hilary Swank/Jennifer Garner (She-men)
-2. Gina Davis (what a stick up your ass)
-1. Sarah Jessica Parker (she looks like feet)
